Comedy Zelda

The Five Zelda Characters You’ll Meet in Your Twenties

You remember it like it was yesterday – sitting in front of your box tv, controller in hand, beginning your epic journey in The Legend of Zelda.

Whether you were traversing the fields of Hyrule or sailing the Great Sea, your epic adventure took you through countless fantasy locations and introduced you to tons of oddball characters. What you didn’t realize back then, however, is that Nintendo wasn’t just creating a world of fantasy for you to explore – they were training you for the types of encounters you’d have in young adulthood. Here are the five Zelda characters you’ll meet in your twenties.

  Tingle AKA The Crazy Guy On The Subway


You’re riding the subway on the way to your next class. You sort of hear what you think sounded like a magic spell, so you pull out one of your earbuds and get an earful of “TINGLE! TINGLE! KOOLO-LIMPAAAH!”

You try to put your earbud back in but it’s too late; he knows you heard him and is walking towards you. He’s rambling on and on about being a fairy, so you just nod your head and hope he’ll lose interest, but this guy could talk all day long. Suddenly he sprinkles you with “fairy dust.” Boy do you not want to find out what that stuff was. You just want to get to your stop, and at this point you’re even willing to buy one of his maps just for the nightmare to end.

Maybe next time I’ll just walk.


 Fi AKA The Know-It-All Who Keeps Interrupting Your Prof


You finally made it off the subway and arrive at class. It’s the first day of the new semester and you can’t wait to cover some brand new subjects. Best of all, your professor seems very knowledgeable and passionate about the subject! But after every other sentence the professor speaks, the same hand flies up in the air faster than you can Z-target.

“Yes, do you have a question?”

My projections indicate that your information has a high probability of being incorrect.

“Oh, really? Would you care to explain why you disagree?”

You can’t believe this. This know it all feels the need to chime in after every comment the prof will make! You paid tuition to hear a specialist lecture, not to listen to a pointless two-hour argument!

“I predict a 19% likelihood that I’ll just keep ranting.”


Navi AKA The Chick On The Sidewalk Who Wants You To Donate To Her Thing


So class is out and you’re on your way back to your Deku Hut of an apartment. Again, you pull out your earbud (why haven’t you learned your lesson?) and hear that girl with the clipboard shout something towards you.

Hey! Listen! Got a minute for a good cause?

“Uhh I’ve got to g-”

Hello! Hey! Sign my clipboard!!”

You keep walking. You only just started working and you can barely afford to eat, let alone to donate to a charity you don’t fully understand.

Look! Hey! Got a minute? Hello!”

Just keep walking…


Ravio AKA The Guest Who Doesn’t Know Boundaries


You finally get back to your humble apartment and are greeted by your old high school friend laying on your sofa. He’s still here? He stopped by to visit your new place for the weekend, but you could have sworn he said he was leaving that morning.

Oh hey! Hope you don’t mind but I sort of redecorated the living room. I’ve got to get comfortable if we’re going to be roommates!”

What!? Did he really just say that? You pity the guy, but you’re not seriously going to protect your washout high school friends forever, are you? You let him know that he can only stay for a few more days, but one way or another the deadline always gets pushed back. Who really owns the place at this point?



 The Hat From Minish Cap AKA Head Lice


An annoying pest that lives on your head.

Don’t be embarrassed, it can happen to the best of us.

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